
Monday, March 30, 2009
Putting "go green go" on a plastic bag that holds two subway tokens is marbles
I was going to write this one myself, but it got preempted. Just as well because I may never have gotten around to it.
via septafail

Monday, March 16, 2009
Microsoft thinking my class notes are music is marbles
I realize that I bitch about computer quirks here quite a bit, but some of these things are just so stupid. How on Earth does Windows decide what columns to use in its file window things? It certainly isn't based on the file types contained therein. Below is one of my law school class folders containing Word docs and pdfs, which in Windows World are music files:
I wonder if clicked the "Play All" button it would read them to me? If I had a Mac it would. If I had a Mac I wouldn't even have to take notes. They've got apps for that now.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Not having a spare couch to burn is marbles
Because if I did, this satellite image from Thursday night would have shown a blip somewhere near Philadelphia.

Monday, March 9, 2009
Hiding headlines in slideshows and mouseovers is marbles
This is slowly taking over the internet, and I don't like it. That is, the stupid slide show type things on web pages that make you move your mouse over various pictures in order to read the headlines and/or insist on playing a little slideshow of the headlines on a few second delay. Why can't I just see everything at once?
Slate and emusic switched to it not long ago, as did a few others. Emusic's might be the worst of all, though we've already been over that. MSN's (that's the Mountaineer Sports Network, not that other weirdo site) is pretty terrible too, as the slideshow moves faster than human reaction time. Now Pitchfork is the latest to go this route, and they've managed to do both the stupid mouseover thing and the stupid slideshow thing. Great work guys.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Trying to get me to complete an online survey by pitching it as a professional development opportunity is marbles
Today I get this email from the law school asking me to complete an online survey to give feedback on various things about the school. This is fine, and I might have considered doing it had this paragraph not been included:
In addition, participating in the survey provides you with an opportunity to responsibly and professionally compliment and critique the services provided by others. The ability to provide substantive feedback is a skill that will serve you well throughout your career in your relationships with clients, superiors, colleagues and subordinates. Responding to this survey allows you to develop this skill while providing us your valued input.I don't even know where to begin. This is easily the stupidest thing I've come across all day, and I make it my business to find (and do) stupid things.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
The ALR's index is marbles
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Saying "the book was better than the movie" is marbles

I can say without much hesitation that I've only genuinely disliked 5 to 10 movies in my entire life. But the number of books I've genuinely disliked is at least 10 times that number. Most books are terrible. Many movies are terrible, but they're still movies, which can be entertaining even when (or because) they're bad, and at worst only take up a few hours of your time. But to waste days on a book that ultimately sucks is just devastating. Maybe this is why I stopped reading books.
That largely irrelevant discussion aside, please lay off the movie adaptations, Slate, et al. Just tell me whether the damn movie was any good on its own merits and holster your comparative literature degree for another day.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Ticketmaster's idea of "buy one get one free" is marbles
I realize I'm taking aim at some easy targets here, but I had to share. I was tempted to go see School of Seven Bells with Fujiya & Miyagi next week until I saw that Ticketmaster surcharges turned a $15 ticket into a $26.75 ticket. Just don't like them enough for that. But then I saw today that they were running a two-for-one special on that show, so I checked it out thinking I might con somebody else into going and save a couple bucks. Turns out, it cost $29.60. Essentially the same as buying two full priced tickets (sans surcharge rape). What a deal.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
The Philosophy of Furniture is unintentionally hilarious, marbles

A judge at common law may be an ordinary man; a good judge of a carpet must be a genius.
Yet we have heard discoursing of carpets, with the air "d'un mouton qui reve," fellows who should not and who could not be entrusted with the management of their own moustaches.
The Dutch have, perhaps, an indeterminate idea that a curtain is not a cabbage.
Weird dude.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Nobody ever liking my favorite song is marbles

Animal Collective's Merriweather Post Pavilion was the subject. Everyone pretty much agrees it's brilliant, and so do I. And after having sat with it for a few weeks now I feel like I have a handle on what my favorite song is ("Taste"). So I went on metacritic and checked five or six of the higher-rated reviews to see what they thought of my song. The majority didn't even mention it, even the ones that made a point of going through a track-by-track description. What gives?
I'd like to blame it on the short period of time that reviewers have with an album before their deadlines come (so they might overlook a grower), but I don't think that's really the case anymore, since everything leaks months in advance. The only thing I can really come up with to explain it is that everyone is wrong except me.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Whining that your pirating software is being pirated is marbles

The absurdity of this needs no elaboration. There seems to be a whole big world of insanity out there, the extent of which I'm only slowly becoming aware. Just makes you want to smack someone.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
That polydactyly is the least marbles thing about this video is marbles
Wait for the doctor. Flamenco guitar and typing skills?
Tennis instant replay is marbles

It's like at work when you make the mistake of throwing a number out to roughly estimate something and your boss latches onto it and treats it like gospel. As soon as something gets quantified, any hope of qualifying it is lost.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Fouling to stop the clock is marbles

I guess this doesn't really happen in the NBA because those guys just make their free throws (save for the few instances where they don't; see Hack-A-Shaq, Hack-A-Ben-Wallace). And of course the college guys should just make them too. But it's unsatisfying to see a game decided in the last 2 minutes based on a skill largely irrelevant to the way it was played for the preceding 38 minutes - a bit like when soccer games go to penalty kicks.
So here's my solution: call the fouls for what they are, intentional fouls, and give the other team two shots and the ball.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Vice making a new Jesco movie is marbles
If somehow this looks appealing to anyone, it's at Sundance, and thus is probably coming to a film festival near you. I guess I'd go see it if Jesco would see any royalties, but I can't imagine that to be the case.
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